We’re probably due another news story about this, so I’m getting in early. GPS confusion.

By this I mean those "special" people who manage to get themselves onto a railway line, or wedged halfway down a narrow back road after blindly following the directions of the little box on their dashboard. When they get stuck or their car is turned into an interesting metal sculpture by a train they will invariably say "the satnav told me to do it" as an excuse.

I think what particularly gets to me is the fact that media outlets, on the whole, nod sympathetically. With the exception of a few commentators nobody says the obvious response that we all had drummed into us at school: "If (insert person/gadget here) told you to put your hand in a fire, would you do that too?"

In the case of the nitwit on a railway line, you do have to wonder how on earth they ended up there. This wasn’t a case of stalling or breaking down on a level crossing, they had actually turned onto the line and driven up it a short distance. Did the fact that they were now bumping over sleepers on gravel not register? If they don’t notice something that obvious their ability to notice something like a phone-wielding idiot wandering aimlessly in front of them has to be questioned. Poor observation is the cause of a huge number of accidents, regardless of what the camera apologists will tell you.

It seems that a satnav reaches right into the hindbrain and flips a little switch. Armed forces the world over spend some time flipping this switch in their troops during basic training. In their case, unquestioning obedience is a safer bet than a division deciding to attack the enemy by whatever method they’ve just thought of. In the case of civilian satnav users, the unquestioning obedience switch can be lethal. Obeying these things sheep-like without using your own eyes and judgement will eventually lead to you becoming one of the plonkers who ended up bogged down in a field.

I think it says something depressing about the state of the world that people are now obeying the instructions of small plastic boxes without thought or question. Speaking as someone who is used to proper digital maps I find the average satnav annoying. It just doesn’t have the detail I want.

For that reason, I came up with a solution. It involves an old laptop living in the boot with a GPS receiver and a touch screen on the dashboard. It not only provides a 1:50k OS map display centred on my current location, it will also play music and browse the web if I find a WiFi hotspot. The best part? It cost less than a conventional satnav and I don’t have an irritating voice telling me to "turn right" while the lights are red…